DBTG: The Laugh Accessorizer
April 22nd, 2009 - Uncategorized - 11 Comments »Sometimes people feel the need to accessorize their laughter. They refuse to be passive recipients of a joke. They’re only satisfied when they’re actively engaged in the whole process.
The Toucher – When I attempt something funny, all I’m looking for in return is a laugh. This person, though, feels like they need to pepper their laughter with some sort of physical contact…anything from a forearm caress to a full-on bicep grab.
The Clapper – Your joke affects this person the same way his favorite team scoring a touchdown would. The moment the joke lands, his first instinct is to give an affirming single clap (not multiple claps…that would be ridiculous). I, unfortunately, am this person.
The Praiser – This person isn’t satisfied with merely laughing at every joke ever told. No, they want to make sure you know that your joke was the one. Their levels of endorsement range from high fives and fist pounds to reverent post-laugh commentary.
The Whiplasher – I am afraid to say something funny around this person. If I happen to land the joke, he violently snaps his head backwards as though his car has just been rear-ended. I never know whether to keep rolling or to stop and see if he is OK.
The Verbalizer – I hate to come out and admit this. This is my go-to when I don’t really think something is that funny. Someone delivers a joke, and instead of trying to muster up a laugh sound, I go straight into a complimentary statement – “Bro, that is hilarious.”
The Sprinkler – We all know this person. Once the clever one-liner is delivered, this person goes wide-mouth and pans across the room, bouncing from person to person, before whipping back to the original jokester.
Which one are you? Any others that I’m missing?
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Not only do I fake laugh, but my fake laugh is about 15 seconds longer than my real life, which gives me time to leave the room before having to fake laugh again.
What about the guy that feels the need to repeat the punchline immediately.
Along the lines of the fake laugh, have you ever been with a guy that doesn’t even fake laugh. He will stare at you in disgust if the joke is not funny. It’s even worse if you are a bystander watching it go down. I feel like a need to go and double my fake laugh just to make up for the guy who has no heart.
*life should be laugh
This may sound incredibly narcissistic – but was I personally the inspiration for 50% of these?
I feel so… exposed.
I have a pet peeve along the same lines as Mark’s comment:
I hate when someone tells a joke, sees that it made you laugh, then repeats the punchline. Sometimes they repeat the punchline more than once.
Sadly, my mother does this.
Oh, I am so guilty of verbalizing. I just say, with a straight face, “That’s funny.” But in truth – I REALLY do think what I am commenting on is funny. Just not funny enough to laugh out loud.
What about the Whizzes His Pants Guy?
He is the guy that whizzes in his pants. Because the joke is so funny.
or the “Stop! You’re GONNA make me whiz my pants!” guy. Thanks for the warning, friend. (scoot three steps over.)
The “I heard it like this” guy who has to “top” you in some strange sense of the word by telling you HIS variation of the same freaking joke.
And then proceeds to go through telling the entire thing again.
Or the quick thinker who finishes your joke before you have a chance to.
Way to steal the glory, douche.
What about the Explainer? They want to rationally understand everything in the joke.
"The chicken was talking to the bartender? Ha! Chickens don't talk! A talking chicken!"
Uh yeah guy – that's kinda why it's a JOKE.