One of the most awkward situations in life is running into a person who has left you a message that you haven’t returned. Most of the time they will just pretend like the phone call never happened. Other times, though, they’ll stare deep into your soul and broach the subject with vigor – Hey, did you get that message I left you? After the full-body sweat kicks in, I search my arsenal of excuses for the most appropriate one.

“Did you get a new number?”
You must say this phrase while pulling out the phone to scroll through recent calls with a confused look on your face to ensure maximum believability. You’re letting the person know that this was definitely a phone malfunction (sometimes it does this, you insist) and was in no way intentional. Before this person can probe any deeper, you need to ask for the “new” number and start programming it in.

“I’ve been meaning to, but I’ve been so busy.”
This is the lamest of excuses, but surprisingly acceptable. You convey the notion that calling this person back has constantly been in the back of your mind, but you were physically unable to make it happen. This explanation requires the ability to do two things at once – while you’re saying this, you must also be forming a list in your head of all the things that made you busy (you know, incase he asks).

“I knew I’d be seeing you.”
This is more of a panic reaction than a well-crafted excuse. Use this when you accidentally run into someone who is expecting a call back. Be careful of the context though. It can really backfire.

Neil: Hey Tyler! Say, did you get that message I left you last month?
Me: Oh…yeah. I, uh,  didn’t call back cause I knew I’d be seeing you here. I was right!
Neil: You knew you’d be seeing me at a grocery store?
Me: Y-Yes…I…sure did. I know how much you love groceries.
Neil: So when you heard my message, you immediately thought, Instead of just calling Neil back, I’ll just drive up to Publix every now and then and see if I don’t run into him.
Me: Unconventional, huh?

“I got a new phone.”
While you may not have gotten a new phone in the time since the message was left, you have gotten a new phone at some point in your life. It’s a stretch, but you’d be surprised by its effectiveness.

What excuses do you use in this situation? I need some fresh ideas.

Oh, and what do you think of the different colored headings? Should I keep doing it?