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Pet Peeves IX: Stores

September 30th, 2009 - A Million Peeves - 10 Comments »

41. The Entrance Ambush
The other day I walked into our local H.H. Gregg and was pounced on by at least three employees (it could’ve been more, but I couldn’t tell due to the fact I was cowering in self-defense). Am I finding everything I’m looking for? Really? This early in the game? Yes sir. I found the entrance. Thank you for your concern.

42. The Trick Question

Cashier: Do you want to save 15%…?
Me: Of course. Who wouldn’t?
Cashier: …by becoming a preferred rewards member?
Me: Oh, no thanks.
Cashier: [Penetrating stare into my soul] It’s free.
Me: Free?
Cashier: Well, sort of. We’ll just add the cost of the membership to the gross purchase total and subtract the 15% that you’ll be saving from the pre-tax amount and you’ll end up saving eight cents today, which in this economy is a pretty good –
Me: There’s nothing I want less than to be a member.

43. Closed Self-Checkout Lines
How are only two out of the six ever open? Please don’t try to explain why. I’m not open to understanding.

44. The Interview
Hey Radio Shack, all I want to do is buy this freaking cord. It seems a little unnecessary (and a lot intrusive) for you to interrogate me with questions about my name, address*, email, phone number, height, weight, shoe size, what magazines I subscribe to, religious beliefs, history of illness, favorite hockey team, cable provider, and what I got for my fourteenth birthday.

Your turn. What bothers you about stores?

Oh, and for more store grievances, check out my post about The Burdens of Shopping for Less and 4 Horrible Things About the Mall.

*If the store we’re in is in the same city that I live in, don’t wait for me to tell you the zip code. I won’t do it. It’s a matter of principal.
___

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/jenvdavis jennifervdavis

    I hate shopping, anyway, so it doesn't take much to frustrate me. However, I get really angry when some employee has put the wrong price on an entire display or the wrong product in that spot, yet I'm supposed to pay the higher price that wasn't listed.

  • Brian Todd

    Two words… Furniture store! I hate those places. Not only do they swarm you like street vendor in a third world country, but they asign one of them to stalk you around the entire freakin store. Kinda like Dwight Shrute when he went to work for Staples: "I will literally be standing right here if you need anything." Here's my solution: when you get there and are attacked get one of their names, and tell them you will call them if you need any help. Then go get help from someone else, and watch the drama unfold. If you're lucky, they might just duke it out over you.

  • http://quixoticantics.wordpress.com Anna

    My *favorite* is at the grocery store when your cashier and bagger are so engrossed with their own (usually personal/inappropriate/gossipy) conversation that they make you feel like you're intruding on something. Oh, I'm sorry. Should I wait to buy my cart full of groceries until after you're done talking about the cashier three lanes over? My humblest apologies.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/trippcrosby trippcrosby

    How about gas pumps needing my zip code?

    Or this..

    Hello and welcome to mcdonalds. Would you like to try one of our new blueberry supershakes today?

    No, I'd just like a number 1.

    Would you like to supersize that?

    No. I just want a number 1. with a coke.

    Would you like anything for dessert with that?

    NO.

    Okay, your total is $6.23. Is there anything else I can do for you?

    YES! glad you asked. You can quit asking me questions that are diverting your restaurant from it's purpose – fast food. OR you can take down this menu here, because I don't need it anymore if you are going to go down the list and ask me if I want each item one at at time.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/joannamuses joannamuses

    I am plus sized and living in Asia where most people are very small. This makes clothes shopping interesting. I hate it when shop attendants make a big deal of my clothing size. I had someone yell out of their store as i walked past "helllooo madam…We has plus sizes for youuuuuuuu" I'd rather my size wasn't pointed out to everyone.

    • Mom

      I'm sure we would all be plus size over there! Genetics – must be nice.

  • nate

    i can't stand the people who insist upon checking your receipt when you exit.

    sir, can i see your receipt?

    nope.

    but sir, i think you're a thief and your refusal only furthers my suspicions…

    well, then you're going to have to chase me to my car or call the police because I am not submitting to the authority of a blue vest and a name tag, sucker.

  • Jared

    I would say the first thing TS said about getting swamped when you first walk in. It happens every time in Home Depot. Right when you walk in they want to help with great eagerness. However, once you stumble upon a problem everyone vanishes. It doesn't help that the store is as big as a city. So you spend 10 minutes trying to find the orange vest, and the answer always is, "sorry sir that is not my area". Motorized cars for everyone in Home Depot would make life so much more fun.

  • Sarah

    Eh, my biggest pet peeve happens at the grocery store. The employees mistake my indecision for confusion, and ask if I need help finding something if I pause for a second in front of the 54 different types of crackers to make the best selection. I get ambushed on every aisle… so I've just started ignoring them. Sometimes they repeat their question a few times, getting louder each time, and I still ignore them.

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