I didn’t plan on starting another new series. Believe you me, I’ve got plenty of them floating around here. But someone needs to fill the vital role of calling people out when their ludicrous comments fly under the radar. That person is me.

Steve Jobs – “We can’t make enough bumpers. No way we can make enough in the quarter.”
Let me get this straight. You have the ability to produce 3 million of the most sophisticated mobile devices of all time for the first three weeks of sales, but there’s “no way” you can make enough rubber cases in an entire quarter? Aren’t there machines that can churn out a quarter million by lunch today? Do we need to get the Livestrong people on this?

Ali from The Bachelorette – “I’ve given up everything to be here.”
This is the line she used on Frank last week when she got dumped. Are you trying to make us feel sorry for you, Ali? You sacrificed a job – a job! – to become the star of the most popular show on television, travel all over the world, and have 30 guys desperately try to win your affection? It is physically impossible for me to feel less sorry for you.

LeBron James – “It’s been an unbelievable experience, a real humbling experience to be even to be in this position.”
Humbling experience, huh? I feel you LeBron. The last time I had multiple teams fly their executives to me and beg me to join their franchise, aired an hour-long special chronicling my four-second decision, caused hundreds of people to literally cry because I didn’t chose their team, and settled for a 6-year, $110.1 million contract, I was also humbled. I wish more people understood us, you know?

What about you? Anyone’s bluff you need to call?

Like I mentioned above, this has the potential to become a series. If you hear any ridiculousness going unchecked and you think I need to address it, please let me know. It’s not only our right… it’s our responsibility.
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Post sponsored by Atlanta Personal Injury Attorney, Robert N. Susko