[UPDATE: Winner of the random drawing is...The Joseph Craven. Email me your address.]

Guest post by real-deal author, Tyler Tarver.
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When I asked Tyler S. to write the forward for my first published book, I knew right off the bat neither of us knew the proper way to spell “foreword”, but after people corrected us in the comments, I knew we’d created something special like an edition.

Speaking of my book, here are 11 reasons you should click here and buy the book that’s changing the world and/or channel:

1. Words & Sentences made it to the top 3 in the Bachelorette and walked away cause it didn’t have feelings for it’s reader; which shows integrity, honor, and the desire to be the next Bachelor.

2. It was once called “the most exactly 300 page book ever written by someone named Tyler.”

3. Words & Sentences in no way has the two words “cowboy” or “up” living next door to each other.

4. Everyday Absurdities is $0.13 per page, Words & Sentences is only $0.04, and Chemical Shifts and Coupling Constants for Silicon-29 is $16.23, and you’re required by Law (of Physics) to buy 2 of the 3.

5. Words & Sentences is around 300 pages, which makes it the perfect size to hold your mint copy of Everyday Absurdities, by the original Tyler Stanton.

6. Buying it not only makes you better looking, but also more attractive.

7. Not only does it have original content by the dangerous Tyler Stanton, but also by someone who has the same name but is not related.

8. The cover is made of the same material found in Alternative Apparel shirts (statement not based in fact).

9. It fights peer pressure and because everyone else is doing it.

10. It has not once worn 2 popped collared shirts at once.

11. Because Tyler Stanton put more or less than 34 hours into the most amazing foreword you will never get to read if you don’t purchase this gift to American Toilet Literature.

Thanks Tyler for wearing cool-guy sunglasses on this really bright Internet, and for writing the forward.

Crap.

Want to win a copy of Words & Sentences? Answer this question in the comments and Tyler will pick one random winner at the end of the day:

What word/sentence/phrase do you want to eliminate from the English language?

Tyler Tarver is primarily a person but also not a billionaire. You can check out his creatively named website tylertarver.com, subscribe to it here, follow him real good on Twitter at the unbreakable code name @tylertarver, or just buy his brand new toilet book he won’t shutup about titled Words&Sentences that people all across the country accent are saying is “the most overrated thing since sliced bread.” He’s not as attractive as you, but he sure does love you.